Yesterday I went with Austin and his class to a museum on a field trip. I brought along an OT because I was unsure of how Austin would react to the surroundings. It is such a big place and so much going on, I thought he may become over stimulated or overwhelmed. We have gone in the past and sometimes his reactions were not favourable, just too much stimulation. He would have to be carried out, crying, sad to say the least. The good news is, he did GREAT yesterday! He took part in the work shop. He answered questions, stayed with the group and played right along with all the others. Very great day in all. He did not want to go to the live spider/insect exhibit, he was upset by that, so his OT and I took him to look at the rest of the museum. He had a great time and we even met up with some friends from our neighbourhood who were also visiting that day. Really quite a nice time and great to see how much Austin has developed and changed in such a short time. WELL DONE BUDDY! Momma is soooooooooo PROUD OF YOU!
So, what's with the title of this post? Well, while we were at the museum, Austin's little friend's Dad said that he would be willing to take Austin to the museum one weekend with his son. (I always get a chill down my spine when someone says this to me. It scares me to death!) I politely (at least I hope I was sensitive enough in my response) said that we do not let Austin go with other people. I explained that Austin has PDD-NOS which is on the autism spectrum and well, we just don't know how he is going to react. He could bolt from someone he doesn't know very easily. It is not a good idea. The trust factor is not there, unfortunately. I feel this is the only way to protect Austin to the best of my ability. I know it may sound a little crazy but hey, did you read the post about the street yard sale? I just cannot bring myself to really trust anyone with him (his grandparents babysit him because they know him so well and he listens to them). Miss Maven has babysat and honestly, she is one of the only people I would leave him with because she knows to expect the unexpected from him and well, she gets him. We had someone come to our house to babysit (we had to do this on emergency one day when my grandfather passed away) and that was okay. She is a member of our extended family and she is great with kids. It went very well. My issue obviously, is Austin going to someone's house or out with someone else. Sometimes I really feel like this fear has taken over and I have no trust in anyone. Sad, I know.
So, when will I feel like Austin should be able to sleepover or go out without me or my husband? I have no idea. I am no where near there and I think it is going to take a lot of time even when Austin is ready. I fill with horrifying thoughts of the possibility that trusting him to someone else could end up in him being harmed. I treasure him so much and would never forgive myself if any harm came to him.
I do welcome your comments on this subject. Do you other parents feel this way? I appreciate all your feedback.
Sending you all *HUGS* & LOVE! :)